Days...

Lately I have had a hard time with life (for lack of better words)...
A hard time trying to figure out how to manage it all and make it all work as I want it...
I've come to the point that I just want to give up because it seems so much easier...
The easy way out! But honestly that's not what I want. I feel like everything is fighting against me and everything is killing me inside currently.

Well...My kiddos are great.

Anastacia is doing great! She is in school and all is doing good.

Triton is also doing well. He will be 4 in June and we are starting to plan his birthday party. We are going to do it down at New Mannford Ramp (where we got married) and have a jupiter jump thing and just have fun. It will be alot of fun and I can participate in the fun times this go around.

Preslee is doing great also. She is getting so big. She is 3 1/2 months old and we are getting ready to schedule her 4 month shots and checkup. We are also planning to have her 3 month pictures taken here this weekend. I'm super excited because I am wanting to  some "fun" things with the pictures. A boa, the pink roses from the wedding, the pink basket from the wedding and her pink giraffe toy...There are just some fun/cute pictures I want to do.

Then I miss my sweet baby, Skylar. I do look at Preslee and I think "gosh what would Skylar be like at this point. She would have been 14 months old." What would she look like? Would she look like Preslee and look like her Daddy? Would she look like me? Would she be walking/talking? All those little things that some people take for granted. People may think that I'm crazy but I try and spend as much time with my little angel as I can. No one realizes the loss of a child than someone that has went through it. My heart breaks. I cry. I'm sad.

But here are the fun times. Preslee is starting to roll over. She is also starting to cut teeth. It has been fun watching her lay on the blankets and roll around and kick and play. She is getting to the point that she likes to "play" with toys.

We added her crib toy that is like the water with glowing lights. It's so cute and she loves it.

She is also starting to eat baby food and have some fruit/vegetable purees, I can't believe she is getting so big honestly.

Now the husband...I love him with all my heart. I feel like I fight to find time to spend with him. He's absolutely amazing. He works 6 days a week for about a month now to provide/support our family. But then there is me in the background that wants alone time. Time for us. That may sound selfish but I don't feel like I get enough time with him. It breaks me down and makes me cry! I hate it! But I guess in its own timing it will all work out!